Celtic Tidings

Shame on me for not posting for awhile, but it has been a up and down time of transitioning since returning to the States. At first it's an incredibly happy time because you finally get to see your family after a year of being gone and reunite with everyone. Life hits you at an incredibly fast pace as you unpack your suitcase and move back into your old room at your parents house. You see your friends again and start to catch up and as you do, you slowly realized that life moved on without during your time away.

It's has been interesting to be home again, but as time goes on I have realized I have changed and so have the people I left a year ago. Though, I cannot tell you in every way that I have changed, because quite frankly I am not entirely sure yet, I just know I am different. I am happy to be home, elated to see everyone, and content being back in Des Moines. But that doesn't mean it isn't difficult at the same time.

People ask me what my year was like, and after finding this quote above I have found the words to tell people. I gained so much this past year in the relationships that I made that, it is hard to even begin to express how much I have been impacted. I fell in love with the people of Belfast and dove head first, openly- heartedly, into wonderfully meaningful friendships. I gained another family in Belfast and I had to say goodbye. It was hard. I have had other goodbyes in my life that were hard but leaving these friendships that had become such an integral part of me was painful. 

When you go live in another country for a year knowing essentially no one, it puts you in a vulnerable state. The relationships you form become deeper rapidly because you have to open yourself up faster. 

The relationships you form during a year of service impact you faster and far more greatly than friends you meet at school, work, and in hobbies or so it has been my experience. Yes, I plan to continue these friendships now and forever but knowing that we are an ocean apart now does make it far more complicated. 

I have been living in a state of missing Belfast and being happy to be home and that is very conflicting. I gained a family in all of my fellow YAVs. I, Courtney Townsend, now have siblings in Anna, Tricia, David, T.J., Beth, Grace, and Kathryn. I was used to living with these people and sharing my life with them. I now want to run across to Grace's room or downstairs to the living room to share with them something I found funny, or an interesting tidbit. And that is not an option anymore. How can you move on from such an amazing situation? It is hard.

I have grown used to having family live out of town ever since I was little. But the difference is, I have known come Thanksgiving, Christmas, and birthdays that I would see my aunts, uncles, and cousins. Now, I do not have that luxury. All of my YAVs are spread out across America and my new aunts, uncles, cousins, etc are thousands of miles away in Northern Ireland. I do not know when the next time I will see them again, ( I'm keeping my fingers crossed some will be able to make it to my wedding.)

This wasn't meant to be a depressing post, more just insight into how I have been feeling upon my return home. I have been feeling A LOT and will probably continue for quite some time. But no matter how sad I may get it is a blessing to know I have people praying for me in Belfast and I am for them. This past year was amazing in every single way and I will not be able to express how truly blessed I feel to have been able to have this experience.